- Andrew Wipper
Custody and parenting time as kids get older
One of the things that often comes up in family law situations is the changing dynamics as the kids get older. As kids get older, all families have to adjust to not only their parenting but also to the amount of time that is available with the kids. Inevitably, teenagers start to choose where they want to be, when they want to be there, and what activities they want to do and when. In a family that is together this can be difficult, especially with multiple kids; in a family that is split up or separated this can create many new issues and communication is key.
As parents, we have to allow for our kids to grow and become more independent. That is tough to do. Add in an ex, and this can become a hurtful, scary, and difficult time. The main thing that everyone in these situations needs to keep in mind is that keeping the focus on what is in your child's best interest should always be your paramount concern. Being flexible with the other parent (where possible) is important. Holding to a strict schedule may well impact your relationship with your child, and not in a positive way. So what do you do? First, remember to love your child more than you dislike your ex. Know that all kids are different and each situation should be viewed with their best interests in mind; knowing that will be hard at times. Allow your kids to grow and express themselves without guilt and shame or putting them in the middle of a fight. Remember, you only have so many years with them. Spend your time together and doing things together rather than putting them in the middle of a years long fight.
If you need help figuring out how to deal with situations that just cannot be solved on their own, gather up your court Order and visit with an attorney who will give you honest advice. You don't necessarily need an attorney that will take on your emotions and just champion your fight....you need realistic, real world advice so that you don't waste thousands of dollars and months of time initiating a legal battle that you will likely ultimately lose. Give us a call for a real look at your situation and realistic advice to help you more than our pockets.
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